I accept what I have said above but find it hard to live by in my day to day ritual of life. At what point can I have adequate confidence in my subconscious nature, if you will, to not require the processing of the evidence of every detail in my life. For example, I wake up in the morning and see that I have a pot of coffee waiting ready for me in which to drown my drowsiness. The coffee is there, yes, I see it, but what evidence is there that I should drink it. I mean really. Is there evidence that I shouldn't drink it? Is there evidence for both? Should I care? If I don't care, does this mean that I am saying that I believe moments exist in which my empirical thoughts are not required or carry less value? If so in what does the reasoning of this thesis culminate? This basically tells me that life doesn't function purely witin the realm of functional reason as it would paralyze me not functionalize me.
Thinking about religion, belief in God, more specifically Christianity, I find it very tiring to be either a Christian or an atheist. The empirical evidence may be there for both (although that would be hard to argue), but the evidence which we have at our hands is so towering that by the time you sift through it, you get to the other side only to say, "What was that detail way back on the other side? Does it contradict this bit of evidence that I am looking at here?" I mean really even if you do reach a conclusion, no one accepts a response from someone that says, "I am an atheist (or Christian for that matter), I can't quite remember all the details but I spent a lot of time working it out and I just know that the conclusion I came to led me to atheism (Christiantiy)."
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This post reminds me of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. The narrator approached life from two sides, rational and belief, and wound up meeting himself in the middle.
To avoid rational/cognitive paralysis, I recommend taking a more Zen-like approach to consciousness. Live (be conscious) in the NOW. If you seek purpose and understanding, still your conscious mind. Your unconscious mind will reveal itself, peace, truth, and understanding.
At dinner last night, we discussed ego. I think Gina mentioned that ego gets in the way of understanding and the expression of Jesus's universal love. As part of my Aikido training, I experienced many such ego-destroying moments. Breakfalls are landings where my entire body has been in the air and needs to succumb to gravity. There is only one thought one can have at that time -- fall. Any other thoughts will result in an incorrect fall and injury. The intersting thing about falling is that just prior to the fall I was attacking my partner as part of practice. My only thought at that time -- attack as instructed. Any other thoughts (attacks) result in injury to my partner.
Unless you are a philosopher or religious studies teacher, no one expects you to retain all the steps you took to cement your beliefs. That's why I suggested that Gina simply find what assumptions, edicts, and limits she can live with.
Paul, you are on the difficult path. It is very much like the greater jihad (Jihad al-akbar) undertaken by Muslims. It is an inner stuggle. Those of us who care about you are supporting you in your quest.
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coffee -- the elixir of consciousness. (my defn.)
Ahh, that is truly a fantastic book.
I do believe that ego can be an issue when striving to reach truth but I also believe it can be a witch to burn in an attempt to avoid reason.
Many people hold dear their beliefs, true or false. I believe that most people hold those beliefs so dear to themselves and to who they are that it becomes a part of their ego and in effect often times becomes a stumbling block to seeking truth. Why? Because it would require a change so fundamental as to upset the core of that person.
I am much more inclined to accept the motives of a person in consternation over an issue. The person who can ask questions and make him or herself vulnerable I do not find to be operating under the guise of huge ego. Really the ego is found mostly in only those who already think they know everything.
I like the idea of NOW. I would like to live that way, to be honest. I think to live in the NOW would open me up for the future, but I can not face myself if I feel I am deluding myself just to live in the now. I do believe that the people who are not truly called to understand their being on a daily basis are those who have success at its fullest because they are not dragged down by the burden and weight understanding they why's.
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