Why or what do I Believe?

I can honestly say that right now my beliefs are like a liquified catepillar in its cocoon during metamorphasis. The only real difference is that the metamorphasis of catepillar has a determined direction and outcome while my direction is not so certain. I don't know if I will end up back as a catepillar or as a butterfly. The temptation might be to say I already am the butterfly or the catepillar but I know that is not yet the case. When I do emerge from my cocoon I am excited to embrace whatever form I have taken.

I say all of this in light of the statement that I make in the "This I Believe" section on the right hand side of the blog. I want to elaborate a little on my beliefs as stated on this site, but please keep in mind the state I find myself as stated in the previous paragraph.

Talking points:
1. Why do I believe Christ said He was god?
2. Why do I believe Jesus Christ said He was the
source of salvation for the world?

For me the answer to questions 1 and 2 is the
same. I have heard and pondered on the thoughts of
many in regards to the idea that Jesus was a great
teacher or a prophet. I just can't by this
interpretation of Jesus as seen in scripture, and I really have tried. In the form that Jesus is
presented to us in the New Testament (no other form
exists that I know of), he clearly states the
antithesis to the claim that he is merely a prophet or top-notch teacher. Looking at the book of John
alone it is apparent to me that Jesus does claim both to be
God or at least from him and the same as him. He also
claims quite apparently to me to be the source of salvation
for the world. Of course the
caveat here is the way I made my initial statement of
belief does not provide some implicit truth but rather
what I think the Bible says. If the Bible is held to
be perfectly true, then one could extrapolate further,
but I am not currently in a determined camp in regards
to that notion.



3. Why do I believe God created us?

I can honestly say that I do not have a rational
answer to this question nor do I think one exists. It may feel rational
intrapersonally intuitively or anecdotally but it is not rational
extrapersonally. This question and my answer to it are very hard for me.

4. What do I mean by salvation?

The apocalyptic view of the New Testament is very
difficult for me to believe. So if I were to give you an answer
as to the object from which we are saved, I would say
imperfection. Imperfections in creation that are caused by unedifying choices made by a free-willed humanity. So salvation to me means that God is in the midst
of restoring creation to its original order. Jesus then would be the embodiment of those tools of restoration which we should take seriously and implement as we play a small but not inconsequential role in restoring creation. Cognizant of some logical holes in this model of salavation, I would not claim this as a belief
just yet.